this is just gonna be a very blank entry

why so?

1. its the wee hours of the night/morning.

2. i am so darn tired

3. lately i've been feeling not myself (come to think of it.. i never had)

4. i just need to talk but cant find anyone......

5. emotional breakdown - lost.sad.lonely.disappointment.cold.etc

6. so so so stressed

i really dont know how and what to think anymore. sometimes i juz feel like breaking down. i think i'm already halfway there.

then i gotten to know this friend. i realised we're having a somewhat similiar lifestyles. we're always on the move - being here, there, everywhere! and plus some other personal issues altogether. i can relate to how hes taking it and how hes feeling deep down inside. but i have yet to tell him my side of the story. hahahha probably i might.. probably might not.

these days been trying to look someone whom i can have long conversations with. someone new and hard to come by. like back during old-school days on ICQ/mIRC where u 'meet' someone new and then realised just how much both of you can relate to each other and how much you can actually talk to him about. how hours turns to seconds and the feeling of wanting to chat with him/her again soon.

i actually met someone like that.. it happened beginning of last yr. actually we knew each other ard Dec 2004. time really flies. anyway, everyday we exchange numerous messages on Friendster. there seemed to be endless things we were able to talk and share bout. from the momemt we took our first step into babyhood until our present days' experiences.

but one day, something happened. something soooo extremely minor that made him changed. it was something so minorly minor u have no idea what hit him in the head and just took a 360 degrees turn. then i just collasped.... my fren back in Sydney heard and tried to console me with all things nice.

everything happened so fast and it just ended in a split nanosecond..... we were so into it that we even talked and made arrangements of our future weekly meetups back n forth Sydney Canberra.. obviously that didn't happen.

come to think of it, he wasn't that great anyway. he even made a comment to me that made me twich and being the nice person i am, didnt made a big fuss out of it but just laughed it off. plus he also proclaimed to be a MCP himself!!

Oh My Lord.

what was i thinking?!?!?!

hahahahahahahhahahahahhahaha.

so much for a mindless entry. kekekeke~ digging up my old story to analyse. kekekeke~

alright. better try to study or gonna juz head to sleep.

bonne nuit~ *kiss*

xoxox